“We need wealth and power,” my huskarls would say. “Those with power are meant to be feared. Take what is yours.”
“No, I will not spread this negative, derogatory stereotype of Vikings that will inevitably reflect upon us in popular media!” I replied. “We will be kind Vikings. We will build alliances. We will trade.”
Suddenly, the day was upon us. A new world, a strange new people. “We come in peace, to build alliances and trade with your leaders,” I declared.
Long story short, about half an hour later I had sacked their convent and punched all their nuns. See? I punched them, not stabbed them.
Behold Hildiridr Mæginbjarnardottir, the kindest goddamn Viking.
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